"I Ain't Here to Kiss No Babies"

I played yesterday with Paul Sands, from Georgia.  We had a fun day on Watchesaw Plantation East in Murrells Inlet--even if most of the greens were virtually unputtable.  They have essentially lost more than half their greens, and we agrred that we'd have been mad as hell if we'd have paid full price to play it.

On one par five Paul had a carry of about 185 yards from a dodgy lie to carry a hazard.  I asked him whether he shouldn't consider laying up.  He looked at me and said, "I ain't here to kiss no babies!" 

You gotta love it.  Sure enough, he hit it in the hazard.  But he got his money's worth.  I've got to remember that one.  "I ain't here to kiss no babies."  Words to live by.

TPC Myrtle Beach

I played the TPC Myrtle Beach and was paired up with Kevin and his son, Brayton from Indiana.  It was a picture-perfect day on a picture-perfect course.  On the other hand, our golf might not have been best described in those terms.

I could tell that Kevin was a gamer, and finally said to him on sixteen that it was a shame we hadn't played a match.  He immediately brightened and we played the last three holes; me against them.  On sixteen, a par three, they both hit the green and I pushed my tee shot left.  I hit a pretty good pitch to about ten feet, while Brayton left his approach putt about five feet short and Kevin then charged his about six feet past the hole.  

I stood over the putt and announced that if I made my putt their putts would start looking alot longer.  Sure enough I rolled mine in and the boys missed both their putts--one up for the good guy.  On the next hole I charged a twenty foot birdie putt right into the back of the hole.  It hopped in the air and rolled about four feet by.  After Kevin made a nice seven-footer for par, I had the four-footer for the half.  However, as is often the story, I choked like a dog.

Eighteen is a tough par four and it was playing dead into the wind.  The boys both hit their tee shots right, leaving themselves in the rough, with over two hundred yards to get home.  I hit one right down the middle and was feeling pretty good about my chances.  Kevin missed his second shot badly, leaving himself about ninety yards short of the green.  Brayton hit a nice shot, but pulled it left of the green.  I then hit a 17 degree wood just short of the green into some lush rough.  

Kevin thinned his third over the green, but Brayton played a really good pitch to about five feet.  I then played an open-faced flop to about four feet.  After Brayton missed his putt, I stood over another four- footer with the chance to show those Indiana boys that they shouldn't mess with old, pot-bellied Canadians.  Sure enough, I lipped it out and we halved the match.

We decided that it was only right that we arrange to meet again to determine who's who on the links.  Unfortunately, the boys were flying out the next morning, so we will have to leave it until some future date.  We had alot of fun on a terrific golf course.  It was much more fun once we decided to make a match of it.

As Walter Travis said, "Always play for something.  Even if it's only a cigar."  A match gets the juices flowing.  Thanks for a great day, boys.

Another Major for Lydia

At the ANA Inspiration in Rancho Mirage we once again witnessed Lydia Ko relentlessly pursue and ultimately win her second Major with a perfect wedge shot to the par five eighteenth for a tap-in birdie.  She is, of course, the youngest ever to win two Majors.  One wonders whether, if she doesn't lose her desire, there are any records she won't break.

On the other hand we were once again forced to witness Arya Jutanugarn, who held the lead much of the day, fall prey to nerves down the stretch and fall away.  Golf can be a cruel game, and we can only hope that Arya can take something positive away from another very public failure.  She is obviously a wonderful talent and, if she can keep putting herself in the hunt, hopefully she can get it done.  The first one is always the hardest.

At eighteen years of age, with 12 wins in 72 starts, including back to back Majors, one has to think Lydia Ko is the greatest young player, male or female, we've ever seen.  This young lady is so composed, so unflappable, you have to think she has ice water running through her veins.  It's incredible to watch.  

If we are inclined to accuse Arya of choking, we might first ask ourselves how many times we needed three pars, or even three bogeys, to shoot our lowest round ever, or to win our flight in the club championship, and actually managed to do it.  In fact, today I had a four footer for birdie on the last hole to break par for the first time this year.  I lipped out the putt.  Golf is a hard game.

The Founders Club at Pawley's Island

I played the Founders Club at Pawley's Island near Myrtle Beach today.  I was fortunate enough to be joined up with three guys from Detroit, Larry, Rick, and Clay.

The weather was perfect, the course was in great shape, and we had a great time.  The Founders Club is an interesting and challenging layout with fairways lined with waste areas that are used as cart paths--an excellent idea. Many of the greens are elevated and well bunkered, some fronted by water.  It definitely isn't a course for the faint of heart.

The guys grew up playing golf at the Rackham Golf Club, designed by Donald Ross.  They were taught the game by Ben Davis, who was apparently the first black club professional and, in Larry's words, "One of the greatest gentlemen I have had the pleasure to know."  Once they'd received the nod from Mr. Davis, the boys were allowed to venture onto the course to play nine holes for the princely sum of fifty cents.  Those nine holes often became many more as the boys often were sent off the back nine and were able to stop at seventeen and slip back over to the eleventh tee and play eleven to seventeen again and again until they were chased off the course.

Larry's father, Fred Schroeder, was a caddy at Oakland Hills during the Depression and actually caddied once for Walter Hagen. His mother also worked at Oakland Hills, though the two actually met at a Roller-skating rink.  Fred taught his son to love the game.  In fact, all the boys played with their dads and, like me, have so many great memories of time on the links with their fathers.  They also played together on their high school golf team.

After a very enjoyable round, we headed back to my place and enjoyed a few beers and some snacks.  We hope to arrange a game at some future date at Rackham.  That would be a real treat.  Golf is such a great game.

Jordan Needs a Big Sunday

Tomorrow is going to be a big day for Jordan Spieth.  With the Masters looming large, Jordan needs a big day tomorrow to give him some confidence leading into Augusta.  He sits five back and needs to straighten out his iron play.  If he can, and the putts start dropping, he just might head down Magnolia Lane ready to add another Major to his resume.

After a brilliant start to the season in Hawaii, Jordan has simply not been the player he was last year.  However, we know there are horses for courses and Jordan has very quickly established that Augusta National is his kind of course.  

Last year I picked Jordan to win the Masters.  It wasn't a particularly difficult pick given his performance there the year before and his great play leading into the tournament.  This year it's a much different story.  But there are tournaments and there are Major tournaments.  The Majors are a different animal altogether.  And Mr. Spieth has proven that he can handle the pressure of a Major.

I hope Jordan has a big day tomorrow.  If not, I think the smart money has to be on Bubba, Adam Scott, Charl Schwartzel, and Jason Day.  They are the guys with the hot hand and, other than Day, the knowledge that they can win a green jacket.

You have to think tomorrow is a big day for Phil as well.  At six back, if he makes a run, you have to think he'll be believing he can get the job done again at the Masters.  What a story that would be.

Palatka Golf Club

Palatka Golf Club probably doesn't rank very far up there in terms of Donald Ross courses.  However, it's a place I love to play.  

It's biggest claim to fame--other than being designed by Donald Ross--is that Babe Ruth apparently walked its fairways.  What I love about the place is its unpretentiousness.  It's a muni.  Nothing fancy; just good golf at a good price.  

From the blues it plays a little over 5800 yards with a par of 70.  I know it sounds like a piece of cake; but don't let the yardage fool you.  Those dastardly upturned-saucer greens and Ross touches make it a challenging walk in the park.  And it is an easy walk, designed in 1925 when golf was pretty much strictly a walking game.  No route marches between tees; no houses lining the fairways; just golf as it was meant to be played--which incidentally is the title of a book about Donald Ross courses.

I played pretty darn well for me and shot 75.  I'd have to have my chipping and putting razor sharp to do much better on this little gem.  I'm actually thinking of renting a place in Palatka next winter so I can haunt the place.  It sits on Moseley Avenue, which is my paternal grandmother's family name.  It must be fate.

If you are down in the Jacksonville/St Augustine area and like old school golf, give Palatka a try.

Cheaters

Golf is a game of honour.  It is probably the only sport when a player will call a penalty on himself.  Bobby Jones lost a Major championship by a stroke after calling a penalty on himself for his ball moving.  No one else was in a position to see the infraction, and some thought this was something very honourable that Bobby had done.

Bobby's response was something to the the effect, "You might as well praise a man for not robbing a bank."  To him there was no question of what he must do.  Many others have done the same sort of thing.  It really wasn't that unusual in championship golf.  Top level players, for the most part are scrupulously honest when it comes to following the rules of golf--I say "for the most part" because nothing is for certain other than death; you may even be able to evade taxes.

That is not, however, always the case.  We have a really good player in our area who has won numerous club championships and tournaments, and competed in our national amateur championship.  He has also become known as a cheater.  I had the occasion to play a match against him a few years ago and had a couple of players advise me to watch him "like a hawk."  I did, even following him to his ball when he hit one into the trees.  I managed to beat him that day.  But just imagine being one of the best players in your area and all the other players can say is, "Watch him."  His reputation as a fine player has been ruined by more than one instance when he was caught cheating.  What a shame.

I have a good friend who lives in Florida and plays with a regular group of guys.  When I spoke to him he told me how he had played in a scramble and his partners had cheated.  As it turned out, they actually won the tournament and my friend was horrified to have to be called up to accept the trophy with his buddies, knowing they had cheated.  He said he felt that everyone in the room were looking at them knowing they hadn't won fairly.  He is now determined to never play in another tournament with these guys.

My advice to him was to find new people to play with.  I played with him and one of his buddies a while ago and they had a match going.  My friend was so preoccupied with making sure his buddy didn't pull a fast one that he couldn't keep his mind on his own game.  It was ridiculous to watch.  But there you have it.  The fact is that the average golfer doesn't even know the rules; let alone follow them.  Harvey Penick maintained that the average golfer would never break 100 on his course if they played by the rules.  Yet he often heard stories about 85's being shot by guys who were in the woods half the day.  It's just the way it is.

Even in the pro ranks there have been accusations of cheating made against top players.  Vijay Singh has always had rumours follow him based on an incident long before he made the PGA tour.  Apparently, Ken Venturi claimed that Arnie stole a Masters from him by not following the rules.  It happens, but very rarely at that level.  I am not, of course, accusing the King, or Vijay, of anything.  I'm simply repeating what I've heard for what it's worth.

I would love to see the rules simplified, so that someone learning the game, or even those of us who have played the game for years, can easily figure out what the right thing is to do.  Bobby Jones felt the rules could be summed up by saying you never touch your ball between the teeing ground and the green without incurring a penalty, and you do nothing to interfere with your opponent's ability to play his game unhindered.  Obviously, that may be an over-simplification, but surely the rules need not be so esoteric that only the studious players can grasp them.

In the meantime, at the recreational level, the rules will be ignored or broken regularly.  Those who do it knowingly must answer to their conscience, or lack thereof, and, in the event they are playing for something significant, hopefully the golfing gods.  Those who do it unwittingly need not worry until someone sets them straight.  As for me, I'd rather not follow my opponent into the woods to make sure he doesn't cheat.  Winning just isn't that important.